My moment of departure has almost arrived. Today is my last full day in the States before I leave for my semester in Spain. This decision was made long before I applied to study abroad six months ago- before I even applied to Penn. I have my 15-year-old self to thank, who got hooked on Spanish TV shows during quarantine. I was inspired to practice Spanish beyond the classroom and reach out to native speakers. My perspective of the world magnified as I discovered that more possibilities of connection were now open to me.

My senior year, I witnessed the magic of the exchange experience in a friend. I became close with a girl in my AP Spanish 5 class from Italy. I developed an admiration for her ability to navigate and express two worlds, two cultures, and three (!) languages. I was curious about her home and how she had created a home here. She was forthcoming about her homesickness and challenges living with her host family. I knew that my time abroad wouldn’t be easy, but I remained confident in my desire to go. 

Recently, that confidence has wavered. Maybe this is analogous to how some may feel before bungee jumping (not that I’ve ever done it!). People feel good about it when they sign up. However, once they get close to the cliff, fear can creep in because they are faced with the gravity of what they are about to do. I have become more aware of my fear of discomfort. The alienation of being perceived and treated as a foreigner. A different grading system and teaching style. Starting over socially. 

Although I am nervous, I remind myself that I am prioritizing growth over comfort. Being somewhat of a homebody, I’m excited by the opportunity to be more adventurous. As I improve my Spanish, travel, and gain insights from a new culture, I hope to develop a stronger sense of self. This fall, I invite you to intentionally seek out the unfamiliar. Whether we like it or not, life will bring surprises. Why don’t we welcome them as gifts?